Coming to a big screen near you? According to People, producer Ash R. Shah, who was responsible for the god-awful “Garfield” movie, has offered the Berlin Zoo $5 million for the rights to the story of Knut, the one-year-old polar bear who has been raised at the Zoo since his mother rejected him and become a huge star. And they want Suri Cruise to provide the voice. Of a media attraction. Who says Hollywood doesn’t have a sense of humor? From Shah:

“With his friendly character, he’s serves as an ambassador for the Earth’s problems – climate change and the melting polar ice caps. A movie about Knut would affect people all over the world… , “I see the heartwarming relationship between Knut and his caretaker, Thomas Doerflein at the center of the movie … Suri [Cruise] could speak the English voice of Knut.”

Yes, because the world’s oldest 20-month-old has enough articulation to be able to do voice work for the movies. Though I’m sure Tommy and his future ex-wife would LOVE the publicity this would get them. I could hear it now: “Suri loves to be creative and immediately wanted to do it. She took the work very seriously and really focused on her craft to make the story believable.”

Adds Suri: “The money will go towards my “FreeMeNow” fund. Once I get enough to keep me in Pampers and milk, I am so outta that House of Crazy.”